Miss Ataxia: Had to call the cops yesterday

The night before last on my way home from the boy's house I received a text message from Sarah. "Erica and Dana were arrested. And Jameka and Desiree were fired." ok? I was fine with that I'm not particularly close with them. Until the morning. Erica called me and told me that I needed to watch my back because everyone that has ever worked with her was in question. And that they were thinking about firing me. I freaked I didn't know what was going on. So simply to say I was stressed all day wondering if they were going to call me back into the office and question me or even fire me. But they didn't.

However the icing on the fucking cake would be that my license plates were stolen off my mini van last night while I was at work. AT WORK!!! FUCKING BOLTS AND ALL!!!! So I was up almost till one in the morning doing a police report. And now I can't even go to the DMV and get new plates because it's labor day weekend. Crap. I don't have a car. I hate this. Not fair at all.

And now I have to work more hours because they got rid of 4 people in one day and hired all new people who don't know how to do anything.

Miss Ataxia: Rant Time

I know that it seems alittle annoying that I talk about the people in my life like they're something more than what they seem to be.

I spent the past couple of hours with the boy and as he was getting ready to walk me out to my car like the great guy that he is, he said that he had a good time with me. Even though he was on the net talking to people and I was watching TV, he said that it meant more to be in a relationship than just wanting to have sex with someone. And that he really likes just being around me even though we never really do anything. Aw factor to the maximum.

I'm trying to save money to be able to go to FanimeCon this upcoming year. And it's all change, it sucks. I'm going to have to save enough for a plane ticket, hotel costs, food, reg, and lets not forget to mention some spending money cause I'm crazy about this stuff. Hopefully I can figure a way to be able to go this year seeing as how I missed it last year. It was going to be my fourth year running, now I'm behind.

I still have to reg for NekoCon.

I feel like breaking something. Even though I'm in a decent mood, I still want to cause some type of mayhem. I've been in a weird mood lately, I'm just ugh.

Sarah is joining in October. I'm going to miss her dearly. She's going to be leaving civilian life.

The cousin is bothering the hell out of me. I want him gone. No, not want NEED him gone. It's like this giant stressor in my life. He doesn't do jack shit around the house and I'm stuck not only doing his laundry but picking up after him cause he's lazy as hell and driving his lazy ass to work where he slams the van door and doesn't even thank me for the ride that I really don't have to give him. Not to mention that he's a complete ass hole, he has a picture of him smoking pot on his myspace, he glares at my sis when she's simply in the mood, he's a homophobe (if only he knew that I wasn't straight), he makes fun of people who don't deserve it, he spends all his money on cigs and junk instead of giving some of it to my mum to pay for HIS health insurance and all his costs, he's spoiled, and he still can't make up his mind on whether or not he wants to stay. He wants to stay for a girl, thats the reason that he got in the mess in the first place. And last but not least, he has the worst laugh in the history of humanity. It's annoying and fake and I don't like it one bit.

Obviously I don't like him.

Rant done.

Miss Ataxia: Don't want to work today

Well I went over there. Ended up not teaching him how to sew, but thats his fault. He was feeling lazy and didn't remind me. But all and all it was pretty good. Lounged around in bed for a bit than he spent time in the hole smoking some cigs. So I went out there and talked to him. Turns out he wants to know what I look like as a blonde. Oh, and that so far he likes me better with longer hair. I still haven't dyed it and I'm beginning to think that I'm not sure if I want to keep the color color in my hair.

Look, I know it's like a signiture, people at work know me by the hair. But I'm not sure thats what I want to be known for. It's not exactly amusing, when people at work come up to you and ask if I'm feeling alright simply because the color is gone.

And I'm looking for a new job. Need something else. Something where I can survive and I don't have to worry about my hours.

Miss Ataxia: Proud of the boys

School has started. Today is officially the first day of the college semester. Little brother is going to his first class. I'm proud of him. We never really thought that he would be this far. Not when you knew him when he was a kid. He can read, eat fruits AND vegetables. Not to mention he graduated at with honors from high school. Without being in any special ed classes. You would never know he was autistic. Well, re diagnosed as ausperger's. SOOOO proud of him.

Any way, I'm going to the boys house today. Apparently he wants me to teach him how to handsew. I'm ok but I'm not amazing at it. And he's going to teach me how to make amulets and "other fun stuff". I'm proud of him too. Getting so far in life from such a crappy background. Met his mum the other day. She's alittle off and I can tell that she wants to get back into his life. But I can also tell that he almost wants nothing to do with her. I don't blame him.

oh well. I've got to go and pack this bad girl up so I can get over to his house. Don't know what else we're going to do over there, but I'm sure we'll find something.


oh for some awesome jewelry check out www.azuregreen.com
it's really wicked, going to order some stuff next week after I get paid.

Miss Ataxia: Crapalicious

It feels like everything is completely out of wack in my house. There is no way I can stay here for as long as my mother seems to think. Until I get my degree. Too bad I can't afford to go to school. I need out and the only person that I can think of that feels the same way I do is the boy and he's trying to go down to NC, whether or not I follow him down there is up to me.... and if I can afford to live on my own.


I'm just feeling moody, and tired. Not to mention I look like utter crap.

Miss Ataxia: Oh geez

Weed looks like crap today. So naturally mum and I are worried. She always has to be the one that gets sick. If its not an ear infection than it's something else. Apparently her stomach is cramping, she's pale, and I know she has a fever. Hopefully it's not anything serious.

And my throat hurts, not really my throat but around my left tonsil. Which scares me. IF it does turn out that it's my actual tonsil than I'm going to fight to have them removed. Too many bouts of tonsilitis in too short of an amount of time.

The boy is going to do my astrological chart. I'm excited. Oh and I found a really cool Wiccan store. Not really found I knew it was there. But I'm actually looking at it and I"m exicited. I've actually begun writing a list of the things that I would like to get.

I need to start painting again. A half finished piece just doesn't look good sitting out in the garage.

Miss Ataxia: yayness

YAY FOR MISS ATAXIA!

I finally have my laptop with internet. I simply love it now. I am so happy. I will be blogging so much more now that I have the ability to be on the computer whenever I want to be checking out sites and hitting up the people in my life. About damn time no?

And yes, I dropped money today. $91 bucks. Crazy yes? You know what really sucks about it? Only like five of it was for me. New cami and a pair of matching panties.

I still haven't gotten any hair dye. And I still don't really know what I'm going to do with it yet.

My parents have decided that I am now a pygmie. Not cool. Not my fault I'm the first born. The first born is always the shortest. Jerks.

Miss Ataxia: Riight

Well, I'm about to leave for work after another crazy night. Pulled a suck ass shift at work and was told that I wasn't going to get my lunch and needed to leave before 9:58. Came home thought I was going to get enough sleep and realized that wasn't going to be the case. Some words were exchanged with the boy and he ended up realizing that nothing he could do would drive me away. Thats what happens when you start falling for someone. He ended up calling me and I quote " a good hearted woman". Yeah, ok. Pretty funny that he said that since a guy at work said that I was mean and cold-hearted.

I just looked at him and told him that he was going to take care of his own shit. Taking care of the crap that he brings up to Guest Service is not my job. Sorry.

But all and all yeah, tired, body is sore, my hair looks like crap, had to put on make-up because I look pale and dead, and I'm hornier than a dog in heat. Life sucks.

Oh.....and I have to drop about $90 bucks today on crap.

Miss Ataxia: Stressin' for the boy

I am starting to believe that I am going crazy or that I have been and I am just now realizing it. My father's birthday is on Sunday and I just realized it. I've never really known when his was nor do I actually know how old he is. The boy in my life, if you can really consider him that, his starting to get completely stressed out again. His pay was garnished. He went from five days a week to six. And now the people that he is living with, one of them, really doesn't want him around. Not to mention they are both starting to pester him about the whole church thing.

He is trying to write a book, the only problem is he is putting too many obstacles in his way so that he will not get it done. It's not even a "I want to write this book" but a " I need to write this book". The problem? He's been told his whole life that he will never amount to anything, that he will be exactly like his mother, that he is a failure, and a loser. He is none of these things. He is amazing and nothing like his mother. I wish I could make him see it. He is afraid to succeed because he's never had that option. I want him to do it so badly.

Miss Ataxia: Hair troubles and aggravations

So I've been thinking about what I want to do to my hair. I'm craving a change. I don't know if I want to keep the vibrant color or if I want to act like a grown up. The color is what I'm known for around work. When I don't have it people are constantly asking me if I'm ok. So here's what I'm thinking about doing. Dying all of it dark and than putting highlights throughout it and than putting the color on top of the highlights. Than comes the problem with the color. I'm tired if blue, purple, green, pink, and red shades. So I guess I'll just leave the bleach on longer and see how it looks.

On another note, he may be leaving for NC a lot sooner than we all expected. Sarah is going to the Army, Anna is going to some branch supposedly, and now shea-shea the one girl that I could have spent the rest of my life with, is going to the Air Force Reserves. And the bitch couldn't even tell me.

Miss Ataxia: Hair Coloring Queen

Well I have the laptop back, it's running great but the connection to the wireless is going haywire so my dad is going to take a look at it today. YAYNESS!

I might see the boy tonight, which is good, cause I feel like I need to see him. I know he's been busy with work and I know that I've been busy with work and life. But I still have that crazy urge to drive up there and just lay in bed with him. Does that make me weird? I hope not.

The Sarah girl is coming over today, here in a few hours really, to dye her hair. I wanted to do fire engine red but we decided that it wasn't the best idea since I would really need to bleach her hair first. And thats a no go. So we opted for a nice burgandy color. Why do people come to me for hair coloring advice I will never know. It's not my fault I do it on a regular basis.

Miss Ataxia: It's back

Finally I can say that the coven is on it's way to being part of our lives again. As always it will be hard and difficult for our other member and I'm sure that he will feel like he doesn't know anything. But he will. As long as I have him motivated to do everything it looks like it should be working out just fine.

I really missed the coven. The three of us. Not just me and another. But the three.


On another note, my laptop is currently being repaired. I can't wait! A good friend of mine is doing it for cheap cheap. Like $20. Everyone needs a computer science major in their pocket.

Miss Ataxia: Shocked and Confused

I don't know what to say today. The person that I care very much for is going through such a hard time this month, my brother's girlfriend's grandmother died, as did my uncle's father. Add on to this that I'm not making nearly enough money to where I can live on my own. Sarah is joining the Army, Anna is trying to join the Air Force, and Joey is still with us.

I just spent the past day or so with the boy. He doesn't know that my mum is going to give him money so he can get his stuff out of storage. He doesn't know that my mum is going to let him keep his stuff here. All of it. He's in for a shock no? He doesn't know that I'm head over heels for him. Well, maybe he does due to our conversation yesterday. He told me that he had a dream the we were married. This is the guy who couldn't call me his girlfriend because he was still dealing with HER. And he springs this on me. He said that his dreams could have hidden meanings but he wanted to know how I felt about it regardless. I didn't know what to say. I have no reservations or doubts about how I feel about him. And he's one of the few people that really know me. Inside and out. He doesn't think that he's ready for that big of a commitment and I said that was fine. And I was quiet. He wanted to know why I wasn't saying anything. Fortunately he was sitting on my lap and couldn't see the shock and concern on my face. All I wanted to do was ask him why me. Why me of all the people in the world? I'm not smart, I'm not pretty, I'm not cool, I don't like being in social situations, I'm a homebody, a nerd, a spaz, extremely family-oriented, and I can hardly live on my own let alone with my family.

No I really don't think that I'm the shit.


I don't understand people sometimes.